Love; a tricky thing to indentify and to really KNOW about. There are different types of love that we learned about: Storge – the love between parents and children, Philia – the type of love between friends that is shared, Eros – Passionate arousal that is romantic and often sexual and Agape – which is Christ-like love. These different types of love are evident in everyone’s life, but at different levels. The RAM, as developed by Dr. John Van Epp, talks about 5 different ways to build a relationship with someone that should be built in a certain order. These principles should build upon each other as steps in this order : knowing them, trusting, relying on, committing to and touching. Too often people jump to the last one without building the other 4 and it causes problems in relationships. Oxytocin is a chemical hormone found in women that is released most often in a physical experience (i.e. kissing, sexual intimacy, giving birth), which creates a bond to that person. It can be hard and take a toll on women when there is not a good foundation for a relationship if a physical intimacy is introduced too quickly. And the last thing I want to remember are the three aspects of really coming to know some one. Known as the “know-quo” the three “t’s” are: Talk, Togetherness, and Time. Talking includes mutual self-disclosure, and togetherness is sharing a wide range of activities together.


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